I missed last week’s edition of Tuesday’s Quotes & Quips because my boys and I had just gotten back from a long weekend of camping in the woods of Kentucky, so much catch up was needed at home and at work.
But I’m back and dealing this week with a topic that I struggle with IMMENSELY and haven’t found a way to confidently overcome as of yet. And, if I’m being honest, it’s something I’ve struggled with since I was a child.
FAILURE and DEFEAT
I have a chronic fear of failing and being defeated. I want so bad to succeed in something, anything, that I begin to be overcome with a crippling fear of failing. And for an OCD perfectionist as myself, it’s often hard to get past just the thought of failing.
So what do I do when that fear overtakes me?
I quit. I stop. I do not pass go, I do not collect the $200 and I go directly to failure jail.
It’s something, that at my fast approaching age of 40, I should just “get over” but that’s easier said than done! Especially when you have your past failures thrown in your face. Yes, that is something I constantly deal with and that really holds me back.
When you have negative people in your life reminding you of the time you failed at_____________ (you fill in the blank)! I have many blanks that can be filled in.
I won’t bore you with my exhaustive list of failures, although it could have the makings of a tantalizing soap opera watched with baited breath.
But alas, I digress……
Anyway, what m trying to say, that my past failures should not be keeping me from future successes. I’m working on venturing outside my comfort zone…which is a huge area to overcome in my life. I’m often very critical of myself, more so than anyone else ever could be (save a few overly zealous friends and family members). This self-criticizing of my actions is what holds me back the most.
So here I am, speaking to an audience of one…ME! (Well, I’m hoping more than just one person reads this blog on occasion) But honestly, I really have to make this a priority in my life. That if I don’t even put myself out there, or attempt to find success, or do something I have always wanted to do, I’ll be defeated from the very get-go.
I don’t want to be known by my failures. I want to be known for my successes and accomplishments in life. It’s as simple as that!
“The brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls are not there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something. Because the brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want it badly enough. They’re there to stop the other people.”
― Randy Pausch
“You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it.”
― Maya Angelou
“Life is full of screwups. You’re supposed to fail sometimes. It’s a required part of the human existance.”
― Sarah Dessen
“But instead of spending our lives running towards our dreams, we are often running away from a fear of failure or a fear of criticism.”
― Eric Wright
“All the time you’re saying to yourself, ‘I could do that, but I won’t,’ — which is just another way of saying that you can’t.”
― Richard Feynman
“Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is delay, not defeat. It is a temporary detour, not a dead end. Failure is something we can avoid only by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.”
― Denis Waitley
“You build on failure. You use it as a stepping sone. Close the door on the past. You don’t try to forget the mistakes, but you don’t dwell on it. You don’t let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space.”
― Johnny Cash